Friends, School, All of the Above

Lately I have been thinking. Did I make the right choice deciding to be homeschooled full time during high school? Academically yes, great move. I have a great GPA, take awesome classes, its looking like I’m going to a great college blah blah blah and all those things ARE great….but what am I gonna have to show for that? WHO am I gonna have with me through that process? I know so many people that were in my same boat during high school, looking like they are going to have this bad ass future and now, there are headed no where. The bummer is, I have very few friends as a support system, hence my fear of not making the right choice. I see people my age with tons of friends, surrounding themselves with great people, and to be honest, I have felt sad about that lately. I havent always had the best luck in the friend department. I have been hurt more times than I care to discuss, been walked on, heart broken, and left for “something better”. Not trying to go for a pity party here but I’m just wondering, had I gone to school, even part time, would I have made stronger friendships, better friendships, and surrounded myself with better people? OR, would it have had the opposite effect, where I have no future and get caught up in the doings of the average teenager and not being going as far as I fully plan on? Food for thought. 

For those of you who don’t know, I am seriously considering attending NYU next fall. It has everything I could have dreamed of….a large BEAUTIFUL campus in a big city, a fabulous business school (and I can also get a minor in journalism..food critic anyone?), it is a private school, 33 Nobel prize winning professors, a 11:1 student to teacher ratio, housing for kids who choose to live substance free during school (a GREAT option for a diabetic!), and so much opportunity. New York has some of the best culinary schools in the WORLD and what better place to live and start a career. OH YEAH…and the golf team? Did I mention that? I am very hopeful when it comes to college. I want out of this super small town and get a taste of culture. All of you Kingman residents can relate to me there. 

Whatever happens I’m sure it will turn out fine, just the process is freaking me out a bit. Have any of you ever been SO excited, and wanted nothing more than that something, but are terrified and want hide at the same time? Yeah, I’m kinda there…

Choices

How do you decided between what you want and what you know is the smartest decision? How do you keep from getting hurt? Why does your heart never agree with your brain? When do you step outside the box and go for what you want? How do you change your ways of thinking and push aside your fears? 

Summaaa Babyyy

The long awaited summer is finallllly here! YAY….well, sorta! It is definitely going to be a different one! To say this past year has been a whirlwind of change would be an understatement. For starters, the ending of this school year means the absolute last of my friends (closest ones at least) are graduating and moving on to a new life except for two of them. One is my age and one is a year younger. I am so proud of them all but seeing them leave is going to be one of the hardest things. Two of my favs are going into the armed forces. One Army, one Navy…oy vey. Just thinking about those two leaving, scares me to death but makes my heart smile. I will never be as brave as those two. 

Josh and Gabby…they are pretty much awesome :) 

Pray for them….They leave for training in June and July :(

As for me, this summer is gonna be so busy and that has hurt people lately. I had to make the decision to take classes and get ahead for golf season OR spend my summer sleeping and lounging, throwing in golf practice now and then. I chose the former. My golf coach Greg is pretty much the coolest. He always is giving me fun drills and now ones I can do with my friends…trampoline flips and football anyone? Basically I will spend my summer practicing, doing drills, going to lessons, and playing golf. I will TRY and fit in my civics class…EW. 

My dear girl alexa came home from a stay at a boarding school for 11 months. I am SO proud of her and the great changes she has made in her life. She may kill me for saying this but next month she will be 1 year sober. She is my absolute OLDEST friend and one of my closest. No matter where life takes us we always pick up right where we left off. This was us (plus Aimee) the other night watching Justin Bieber. We are all in LOVE with him <3

I want this day to turn around and start over.

To guarantee success, act as
if it were impossible to fail.

Dinner for two

SO for starters, I HATE Valentine’s Day. Most people say, it’s because you are single. NO…wrong answer. I hated it when I had a boyfriend on Vday. I think it had become WAY over commercialized and quite honestly, people get STUPID on Feb. 14th. The singles get sad and droopy…well people you were single yesterday, probably will be single tomorrow, yet you are still whining. People who are NOT single do one of two things…. A) Spend WAY too much money, go WAY over board and honestly, WHAT THE HECK FOR?! EVERYDAY should be the day you treat the one you love special. And behind door B) Forget and hurt someones feelings. Someone I know (quite well) made a romantic meal for her husband, got dressed up, sent their young kids away, lit candles (you get the idea) and he did nothing for her. No flowers. No candles. No card. Nothing. I hate the holiday and my heart still kinda broke for her.

Anyways, moving along. I had no boyfriend therefore no Vday plans. I got a call from a family friend who knows I love to cook (and its probably the thing I am best at in life ha!!). He was wanting to give me money (spending other peoples money?!?! nooo problem!) to make a special suprise dinner for him and his wife. My 1st catering job!!! I was STOKED!!! I spent an entire night planning the menu, two days shopping, another night prepping, and did about 4 hours of cooking after that. Their adorable daughters helped me a little bit in the kitchen and were sweet little waitresses. Trying to get them to pronounce risotto was the funniest thing ever….it was ree zaah tea. Maybe you had to be there;) The cooking went out without a hitch. It was so smooth, and everything came out juuust how I wanted it to. Best of all, Charlie and Tammy (recipients of dinner) LOVED it. I got to use their huge kitchen while they ate dinner and danced in their formal sitting room/piano room. Best valentines day I have ever had, thats for sure!! Of course, I forgot my camera to take pictures of the dinner but they have a bunch…maybe I will post them later. Probably not hah! Here is the menu:

Appetizer: Warm goat cheese stuffed dates seasoned with thyme and rosemary and pink sea salt and topped with walnuts. Served with a balsamic reduction syrup.

(When their daughters took the dish to their parents, I heard the girls say, “Stuffed prunes! Enjoy!” I died laughing)

Salad: Baby spinach with a cider vinaigrette dressing topped with caramelized shallots and crispy pancetta

Main Course: Baked wild Alaskan Salmon stuffed with spinach, marscarpone & cream cheese, and nutmeg. Coated with homemade parmesan breadcrumbs

Sides: Classic risotto with green and yellow zuchinni 

Vegetable: Garlic roasted asparagus 

Dessert: Chocolate molten lava cake served with a dollop of homemade whipped cream flavored with Moroccan vanilla beans. On the side was an espresso milkshake martini made with ice cream, hot cocoa mix, espresso, whole milk, ice, and of course, vodka. (People thing its weird I cook with alcohol….nope. It’s scientifically proven to be cooked off AND I don’t have to drink martinis, I just make them!)

All in all, I would say the night was SUPER successful. Tammy’s favorite food is salmon, but she said this was the best one ever. And Charlie will probably kill me if he ever reads this but he ate 3 of the cakes:)! I was so glad I got to make their night special! Hopefully, there are many more Valentines days that are that sweet:)

Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; hate less, love more; and all good things are yours.

Diabetes, go to hell.

Everyone who doesn’t have Type-1 Diabetes, THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS!!!!!! Just so ya know, I am SICK of feeling like death every time my numbers get whacked out. No, I’m not really dying, my numbers are still under fairly good control, it just really freaking sucks being 17 with diabetes. The list of the bull I go through is endless and I feel like this ongoing battle is endless…oh wait, it is. Frick. Any sort of hormone changes my numbers, any sort of stress, any change in diet- good or bad- changes it. I’m having this great new side effect of highs….tingling feet and hands. Not sure what to think of that. Does it concern me? Hell yeah. Does it scare me that I am only 17 and have already had this for 15 years (well almost, May 8th). Definitely. Would I give anything in the world to change it? Yep. You have no idea. 

Really though, I am pretty dang healthy and take good care of myself. It just gets OLD having to go rounds with this disease. Some days, I wish I could just be normal. Is that too much to ask? Probably is. Good news, there is a new form of the pump coming out called the Jewel. It is 1/4 inch tall, attaches right to my skin, has no chords to get caught on things and ripped out of my body, holds 400 units of insulin, tests my blood sugar AND…….this is the best part…….it is all controlled via Android cell phone app. HOW FREAKING COOL!? This should be available by the end of the year. Hopefully my pump can hang on a little bit longer:))) 

Musical Emotions

Have you ever noticed that listening to certain songs trigger emotions? I’m suuuure you all have. Sometimes I love that feeling! I love listening to songs, replaying super fun times in my head. Whenever I hear J-Lo, always always always think of my mom. She has (affectionately) acquired the nick-name J-Lo from her friends. She not only LOVES her music, but LOVES to dance like Jennifer even more. Quite comical, trust me. Anytime I hear Blink-182 I get taken back to summer 09, VIP seats at the concert, and unlimited Red Bull (hellloooo no sleep all night). By far, on of the best nights of my life, spent with great people. Most of the time I love the feelings music brings back. Other times, it’s hard. It makes me remember what I miss, how things were in the past,  and having “songs” with certain people: best friends, family members, boyfriends, anyone else that is no longer in the picture. Those are the times that are difficult. My English class is all about poetry this week and we are talking about our favorite kinds. I was about to write that I really didn’t care for poetry and now that I think about it, I really do love it. Songs can express so much love, so much feeling, so much inspiration. It makes you feel! 

Firey Excitement

Here is a little re-cap of the excitement of my week…. The girls and I were STARVING so we are shoveling any food we can in our mouths after my classes. Finally, we made some sandwiches and were juuust sitting down on the not-so-comfy-couch. Our favorite show, CSI was on. We’re chillin, eating our food, minding our own business, when we hear this EAR PIERCING beeping. For a second, we thought it was the crime show on! Um WRONG…..within seconds every alarm in our house was going off. In case you don’t know, we have 8! I tell you what that was the loudest noise I have EVER heard in my life. Of course, they couldn’t go off together and in sync, every single alarm was different. The poor dog was going NUTS. I look down the hallway quickly and notice that were is no smoke, no heat, and no sign of flames. Tay is screaming and now crying at this point so Cali grabs the dog and we all run out of the house. I manage to grab the keys. That were sitting right by the door. Next thing I know here comes Taylor booking it up the driveway SCREAMING, “I need pants I need pants I need pants I’M IN MY FOOTIES!!!!!!!” hahah SORRY tay, I had to put that. I tell her there is NO way in hell she is going back in there for pants. I should learn to be specific because her reply was, “FINE THEN! I will go get my blackberry!!!” HAHAHA I couldn’t help but laugh! I drug that girl by her hands right into the car.

By now my mom was rushing home from work. What are the odds that a fireman would be at my parents office right when we called?!? He told us that it was probably one alarm that had gone bad setting off the others BUT that it could also be an electrical fire. After 10 minutes, we drove back by the house and there was no smoke, no heat, and no weird smells. My mom showed up and we changed the batteries and the incessant beeping STOPPED!! Or so we had thought. We go about our business and about 30 mins later…..alarms are off AGAIN. I disconnected the main smoke alarm and all the beeps stop yet again. I leave the house and they go off while my sisters are there for the 3rd time!!!! My dad had to talk her out of a panic attack and she ended up having to disconnect the wires while he talked her through it over the phone. If a 15 year old doing electrical work isn’t dangerous I don’t know what is!! ANYWAYS, we had to replace the main alarm and rewire them to the other 7 alarms. We had to have a really nice fireman/friend come over and fix them for us…… I have a feeling I forgot to mention that my dad was out of town!! HA ohhh such great timing:)